THAT DOES NOT DEFINE YOU

I was so excited; 14 years old and the cutie of the block asked me to go to the movies?! “It was a date”, I thought. I knocked on the door and when he opened it I remember thinking, “he wasn’t even dressed”. But God he moved so fast. He shut the door, turned off the lights and we hit the floor. “STOP”, “its okay” he said as he proceeded to take my pants down just enough to invade. After losing the struggle I just laid there with tears rolling down my face as he pounded away…we never made it to the movies.

Of course his version of the story made street credit headlines and I was featured as the loose cannon. I tried to defend my reputation without sharing the embarrassment with the world, but only one person believed the truth. This was because apparently I wasn’t the only young lady privileged to be forced into lover boy’s “lights out” romantic technique. I know that’s not who I was and what really happened. What I wanted for myself in life was not going to end that night in that room. What happened to me was painful (emotionally and physically), confusing, embarrassing and traumatizing. But it does not define who I am today or even who I was a week after it happened. I saw my aggressor years later, our eyes met and by his expression I knew he felt my recovery burning through him. I felt stronger than him, smarter than him, I was not that little girl so anxious for his attention I couldn’t see the forest for the trees. With growth, support and love I had overcome his moments of abuse and it had not defined me! If something like this happens to you, tell an adult you can really trust and then seek recovery through counsel, prayer and forgiveness. You can never get that “moment” back but you have a lifetime of better moments ahead of you. 

Anonymous Writer