This past week I took a pair of handcuffs and latched my hands. Knowing there were no keys I snapped them closed confident that I could pick the locks open.....
Hours later I was still trapped, and though just my hands were bound, this affected my ability to get anything accomplished.
No I am not that idle, but I have been thinking a lot about how my own doubts affect my life; very much as though I snapped a pair of handcuffs on my hands, and tried to accomplish my purpose. I realized that self-doubt in many ways play the role of cuffing my hands without having to execute the activity in a literal sense.
IT'S HARD TO SECURELY GRASP ANYTHING
You have the ideas, and the tools but doubt prevents us from getting thing done. We come up with all the reasons why it will not work out. Consequently, the drive and aggression to see things through is non-existent. Great faith but no works- death. Doubt is a dream killer.
LOSS OF BALANCE
Self-doubt kills determination. We are not sure what we want, and so we are all over the place. You decide you want to start your own business, and just when you make your decision of coarse, someone decides to give their advice; and the advice always comes from the ones you never solicited. They always know why your idea is crazy, and before you know it your idea to open a restaurant becomes a plan to set up a pop-corn stand on the street corner, because you doubt that your purpose will materialize.
I love my Mom, but she can be very negative at times. I went to her about a side business I wanted to do, and the first thing from her mouth was "what to have all that unsold product on your hands?" I was somewhat crushed, and blamed her for the fact that I abandoned my idea, but it was my fault. If this was what I really wanted to do self-confidence should have driven me to prove all the reasons why my endeavor would succeed.
SETTLING
Try sitting up from a lying position with your hands tied. It is a bit of a challenge, and somewhat demotivating. If we had to function like that we would probably want to lie in bed a little bit longer every morning. I realize that self-doubt does the same thing. Can you think of a lot of unfinished projects that you were really excited about when they were just ideas? How about the comfort zone we sit in because we are afraid to fail at something new; settling to keep our hands cuffed. We even go further as to justify our decision to stay tied up. After all, we can still walk, and the rest of the body still works. I just need to make the best of this. Also, when self-doubt cuffs us it is really difficult to get up from a down position when things, people, or life knock us over. I have realized that confidence goes a long way when life happens.
VULNERABILITY
When we tie our hands up with self doubt we become more dependent on others than we really should be. Have you ever met someone who can't make decision on their own, and is constantly seeking validation from others. My brother is a computer wiz so I always ask him for help whenever I have technical issues. One day he told me I was using him as a crutch. I was offended at first, but it pushed me to try and figure things out myself by researching the problems. Calling my brother became a last resort. I realized I was more capable than I thought. I was able to walk without the crutches, but my vulnerability never allowed me to try.
I watch people walking their dogs, and it amuses me to see that as excited as the dog gets to chase something that catches his/her eyes, he only gets so far and then the owner snaps the leash. Self-doubt owns us, and limits our ability to reach our goals.
SS Writer